weak: Jul. 17, 2002 (8:48 am)

i laid selfishly sick on my own bed like a child. i would not let my mother leave (and she did not want to). my empty stomach caused shivers and naussea. i collapsed in the heat in tenley town near the safeway and i felt like those concentration camp survivors who were fed hershey bars by american soldiers which made them sick because they had not eaten so much in a long long time. and it's so easy to stop physical ailments. because i know i don't want to lay on my bed again wishing for an iv because eating makes me feel nauseaus. having trouble breathing with a weak pulse. (for a weak girl)

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