static: May. 20, 2002 (6:24 pm)

backstage nights, staring at static hoping for a change. utterly unloved, uncared for, between wine and blood.

nothing had changed. for all i knew they really were dancing, singing...'i'm going to get me a whole bunch of boys.' say what's wrong, it won't change. i can't say what's most important to him. desire for him to care as paul cares, escape cruelty.

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