month: May. 28, 2002 (9:03 pm)

it's sunny over here. but i can't lead you on anymore. i'm no good for you,i make you suffer. i keep you from seeing a professional.(i don't want to deal with your mess. i don't want to be with you)

xoxo paul

i get this ache in my stomach when his happens. a hunger, a craving, a desire that only comes out in violent shakes and bright red face. we've had this talk before, before, before, before. try to remember to boy who kicked his feet up on the table and talked philosophy, dug through his bag for something he found for me. useless, he has someone else. they all do.

just a month ago, paul said he was sorry he did that to me.

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