confession: Jul. 31, 2002 (9:19 am)

we weren't arguing, but merely pointing out all the things that are wrong with me. self centered. (exactly like you said katie. it all came true all over again.) self pitying. not as much as an existential superhero as i'd like to believe. i was crying like before.

how many times does it take?

because i dont know what to do, what to say to anyone.

we all keep saying that i live in cycles. circling around the fact that i have no real relationships. no real friends. and we don't talk enough which makes me sad which makes you not want to hang out with me which makes me sadder. you don't want confessions, you want conversations.

(i'm afraid i'm just going to keep throwing tomatoes at your pretty white dresses until there are no more white dresses)

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