black eyes: Jul. 17, 2005 (9:24 am)

yesterday, i had one of the young hispanic girl chashiers page brett from the basement office and he stood outside of the top of the stairs staring. we went out back and i pulled out the to do list of things to talk to him about that i've been writing since i last left the grocery store and later, alone with ben in the apartment, pulled out again to tell ben about my day and felt terrible about the excitement in my voice and my undilated pupils and how monogamous sex is so easy for me, but mongamous love is not.

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